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This April, for Autism Acceptance Month, we’re celebrating differences. Every journey with autism is unique and whether it’s your personal experience or that of your child and family, your story can help others feel seen, understood, and supported.

As part of Autism Acceptance Month, we’ve invited autistic individuals, parents, caregivers, and families to share their experiences and were overwhelmed by the response.

Today, we would love to introduce you to Jo:

I’ve always felt different, since I was very little. As a girl I would love to walk in the woods with my mum, and she would tell me all the information she could about the plants and birds around me- I found it truly magical. I would get lost in the sunshine in a dewdrop, or a spiderweb on a frosty day.

I found school so overwhelming, I wouldn’t want to go in. I would cling to my mum, or pretend I was too poorly to go in. I actually enjoyed infant school and primary, I didn’t know why I didn’t want to go in. My tummy would be so painful all the time. In fact, when I was 4, I was sent to hospital in an ambulance because they thought I had appendicitis- it turned out, I was just so anxious all the time.
After school, I would go to my room, lie on my bed and stare at the wallpaper, or sometimes even fall asleep!
I was a pretty social kid, I had two older brothers, and I had a lovely set of friends throughout school. I was never one for peer pressure or conforming, or fitting in. I have always felt ‘This is me, this is who I am, and I’m not changing it’, but I have always wanted to feel accepted and understood.
I had lots of nicknames as a kid and teenager, namely ‘Crazy Jo’ and ‘Weird Jo’, and these same nicknames spanned different friends and different social settings! To this day, I’m still not quite sure how I deserved those nicknames, but I didn’t mind.

When I was 17, I suddenly woke up feeling totally miserable and numb. I can’t really describe it. It was like all the good from me had been sucked out. I lived like that for three weeks, nothing was shifting it. I went to the GP who said I had depression, and I was put on 250mg of amitryptyline. I was trying to do my A levels, have friends and be a fun teenager, but I felt like a zombie. I spent my entire college career going back and forth to a dodgy psychiatrist (really!) and being dosed up on pills.

I love music, I play guitar (it’s my special interest), and was in bands as a teenager, which I loved. And I loved to go out with my friends and watch other bands, but when I’d get there, I’d find myself having a panic attack and hiding in a toilet cubicle. I didn’t know why. I’d have to phone my poor old dad to come and rescue me pretty much every Friday night! I wanted to go out, I wanted to watch the bands and be with my friends and be a normal teenager, but I was freaking out all the time.
Being a teenager was a really rough time for me, I was self harming a lot, I had a couple of suicide attempts, I experienced sexual abuse, physical abuse, verbal abuse. I felt very alone. Even being around friends, I just always felt alone. I always felt different. And I knew I was different, but didn’t know why. I actually believed myself to be a freak.
Music and my dog were my comfort- and always I’ve found music, animals and nature to be my biggest healer.

After college, I went to Uni. It was a nightmare for me. I was in halls with 6 other people- who were loud, smoked, made a mess. The course I was doing was far too advanced for me. I missed my home, missed everything. I dropped out and felt like a total failure.

I moved back in with my parents, feeling absolutely lost, too frightened to get a job, still depressed, still on high strength antidepressants. I put on a lot of weight.
I developed agaraphobia, I was so scared of everything. I just felt stuck. I knew I needed to change, but I didn’t know how. I couldn’t see the next step.

I decided to lose weight, it was hard, but I did it. I was really brave and decided to go out and make new friends, it was so scary, but I did it and I am still friends with them today. I got a job at a book shop, which I loved, and it improved my self confidence, til the boss gave me an appraisal and I cried and cried and left and never went back.

Since then, I developed my spiritual abilities and discovered I’m a psychic and medium, and have been doing readings and healings for people for the past 15 years. I also met Ross, who is the most loving, kind and patient person on the planet. He has helped me through all my mental health ups and downs, my fluctuating weight, my panic attacks, self harming episodes, panic attacks. All of it. He is my rock, and he makes me laugh every day.

We got married in 2013 and had a little girl in 2014, a couple of years after, we were watching telly and it was about autistic women. Ross and I both realised, I was just like them. I thought ‘that’s it! I’m not depressed! I’m autistic!’ We went to the GP, he laughed at me and said there was no way I am autistic, because I was making eye contact and having a conversation.

I was absolutely devastated.
Time passed, I learned more and more about autism, and was more convinced that not only am I autistic, but so was my little girl.
So I went back, armed with information. I was referred and diagnosed as autistic when I was 41.

The day I was diagnosed changed my life. I now know why I freak out in supermarkets or waiting rooms, or anywhere busy or noisy. I know that if I do something social, it has to be in a quiet place, or I need lots of alone time after. If I go and watch a band or listen to some music, I need to do it with Ross or a trusted friend, so I can escape if it gets too much. I am so much kinder to myself now. I’ve made friends who are autistic, and I don’t feel different anymore, I’ve met my people. I know who I am and why I am the way I am. And it’s amazing.

My daughter got her diagnosis this year at age 11. So she has a 30 year advantage on me, so I’m hopeful she can navigate her life knowing herself, being proud of herself, and getting the support she needs.

I truly believe we can do anything we set our mind to, we just need the support from family and friends, and to remember, we’re not alone.

A big thank you to Jo from all of us at Autism Anglia. If you would like to know more about what we’re doing this Autism Acceptance Month, click here.